Man Wants to Divorce Wife so He Can Watch Porn

Answers_Man leaves wife for free Porn_LI shameless go onto Yahoo Answers occasionally to promote my views on pornography. A while back I came upon the above question and answer. I was a little disturbed by it. But it does show the natural man and the power of this compulsion to change our lives for the worst.

Hopefully you can skim over the screen shot above from Yahoo Answers. But the situation is all too often common. The man developed his compulsion for porn at the young age of 15. And he is now 22 and has 7 years of porn compulsion under his belt. Now he thinks it will be huge burden off his shoulders to divorce his wife so she won’t nag and shame him for his compulsion.

It makes sense to assume that the man has tried to quit porn before even though he does not say he has tried to quit in his question. I think this is the case because he thinks it would be easier to divorce his wife than quit porn. Or at least he believes he will be happier with porn than with his wife.

I feel for the guy because I have felt the frustrations of trying to quit porn. But overall I think this guy is really selling himself short in life.

His response to life’s problems is one of a quitter.  Most of the people who responded were telling him he was wrong but he chose probably the one response that encouraged him to keep looking at porn. And that response was not even to divorce his wife but to hide the porn use more effectively.

It’s easy to poke fun at this guy. But the main purpose of this post is to ask you: how is porn affecting your life? What things are you giving up in exchange for the porn use? What things are you willing to give up for your porn use?

You are here to seek answers. Ask yourself some hard questions. The purpose of these questions is not to shame you or make you feel regret (the “r” word from TROUBLED). The purpose is to motivate to get you to be determined and to not be a quitter. To quit porn you have to get up quite a few times. You will lose count the amount of times you have to recommit yourself to the program. The important thing is not the number of times you have to recommit but your consistency. Do you keep trying, in other words? Overcoming the addiction is not hard in and of itself, its more about being consistent even when progress seems to be elusive.

So what are you giving up by watch porn? There are consequences to be sure even if you have become very adept at hiding your tracks and at not getting caught.

Consequences might be:

  • Lack of confidence
  • Unable to look people (especially women) in the eyes
  • Irritable
  • General lack of motivation
  • Not wanting to be social – staying home
  • Being tired from lack of sleep
  • Unable to enjoy the simple things in life

Don’t let porn get so out of control that it seems easier to divorce your wife than give up porn. Give yourself a minute to think about your life and how it might be different in the future by giving up porn.

Have you even once felt good about yourself or about your actions after going through with a slip? The answer is probably no. Porn will always leave you in worse shape than you were before. And you being in a worse shape will have consequences. Not being on top of your game has consequences. Now it is time to give up porn and start living life on your terms. There are benefits to being porn free and masturbation free. Just take your list of the bad effects of porn and take their opposite.

Benefits of living a porn free life:

  • Greater confidence
  • Able to look people in the eyes
  • Able to look women in the eyes
  • Pleasant
  • General increase of motivation
  • Wanting to be social – getting out of the house
  • Being well rested with a good night’s sleep
  • Able to enjoy the simple things in life

The choice is yours. With effective strategies and activities one can heal the brain and be pornography free. If you have failed to quit porn before, it is probably because you were trying to quit by sheer force of will. You did not know how the game was being played in your mind. Once you know the rules of the game, it becomes infinitely easier to win the game. Once you have effective strategies and activities, winning will not seem as hard as it originally seemed. Get the RAMP solution to porn addiction!

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