Imagining Pornstars as Sisters, Daughters or Mothers Does NOT Cure Porn Addiction

Synapse in human neural system

In my youth I was told by well meaning people from church that a good way to avoid porn is to realize that the women in porn are someone’s sister, someone’s daughter or someone’s mother. “What if that was your sister, daughter or mother on the monitor? Would you watch porn then?”

Now I must emphasis that the intention of those who taught this was well meaning, however, the results of their action was lacking. Of course they did not know how pornography addiction works. They didn’t know about the reward mechanism of the brain. They didn’t know about the Limbic System and how it functions and its role in forming a porn addiction.

The Limbic System does not feel sympathy. Its sole exists is to accomplish one basic need: the need for survival. That basic need also includes procreation which in essence is a form of survival. It does this with releasing chemicals in the brain that rewards behavior which it deems as “good.” So if you eat something sugary it will release pleasure chemicals telling you to eat more. Because if you have sugar in your blood you will have energy to run away from something that would potentially end your life. If you eat something fatty then it rewards you because it will believes you can then store that extra fat for when you don’t have food. You’ll have fat reserves to keep you alive during times of famine.

The highest release of chemicals happens during sex. The Limbic System believes that through sex your genetics will be passed on to offspring. Offspring will allow you, in a removed form, to continue living. Creating offspring is the ultimate form of survival, a type of survival with potentially no end. It is logical that the Limbic System would save its best and highest chemical release for procreation (Read: Porn is NOT Your Problem: Brain Chemicals Are).

Does the Limbic System care about sympathy? Does it feel regret? Does it feel embarrassment? No! Those feelings don’t have meaning when survival is on the line. The circuitry for those feelings is not in the Limbic System.

So if you are looking at porn and you try and think that the actress is your sister, your daughter or your mother it will not stop the Limbic System from releasing chemicals. It will not stop the desire to watch porn. In fact it might increase the possibility of causing an abnormal addiction. The Limbic System is going to go ahead and release the chemicals while circuitry in the brain that is responsible for sympathy, regret and embarrassment and whatever other emotions not normally associated with sex are fired off. When brain circuitry not normally used during sex goes off while the Limbic System is releasing chemicals these parts of the brain will not know what hit them. It is not normal for the area of the brain that feels regret to fire off while being engulfed by the Limbic System’s chemicals. This can cause abnormalities in the sexual desires of the individual and increase the probability of an addiction forming.

It is not unheard of for someone who has a history of watching porn to begin to watch porn that is not of their natural sexual orientation. This can be very troubling to the individual because they will not understand why their porn preference has changed and no longer match their sexual orientation. This might have started because of the abnormality stated above. If the brain begins to associate the feeling of regret with chemical release of procreation, this association could eventually cause this abnormality of porn not matching the individual’s sexual orientation.

The solution to porn addiction is to work with the brain and help the Limbic System heal. During a porn addiction the Limbic System becomes over reactive. The goal is to let the Limbic System heal so that it does not over react to life. There by allow you to live porn free.

The brain is incredibly elastic. It literally can change its shape and form. It is the truest form of “Mind over Matter.” Your thoughts can actually move matter in your brain. Anything that has been created through porn can be undone. Never give up hope. If you are determined you can heal yourself. I offer the RAMP Solution as your first step to creating this change. Through the RAMP Solution you will learn about your brain and then learn effective strategies and activities to heal your brain.

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